直接用HTML。

原文

Just fucking use HTML

Hey, dipshit! You know what loads faster than your bloated, overengineered mess? Plain, unadulterated HTML. And you know what doesn't break every motherfucking Tuesday? HTML that just fucking works. Why the fuck are you overcomplicating things, you masochistic fuck? You're out here acting like you're building the next goddamn moon landing when all you need is a button and some text.

Newsflash, asshole: the web was doing just fine before your bloated frameworks crawled out of the sewer. You're out here dropping ten grand on some fancy-ass framework like it's a Gucci purse, just to haul around the same shitty groceries you could've carried in a plastic bag from 1995. Why the hell are you jumping through all these hoops when HTML's been sitting there, ready to go, since the dawn of the goddamn internet?

So you call yourself a web developer? Fucking pathetic.

You've gotta be kidding me, asshat. Do you even fucking know how to display a button on screen without the current modern fuckery you lean on? Here, little shit, is your button:

Tattoo this code on your forehead so that you'll remember when you look at your fat face in the mirror:

<button>Fucking button</button>

But did you notice something, you smug bastard? This HTML shit is the fucking Energizer Bunny of the web. It just keeps going, no fancy plugins or updates required. Your precious framework's out there choking on its own hype, obsolete before you even finish the tutorial, while this button's still kicking ass like it's 1995. It's been here since the web was a screaming toddler, and it'll still be standing when your stack's just a dusty footnote in some asshole's commit history.

Can't make shit beautiful with HTML, you say? Eat this, you pixel-pushing fuck:

Why it's beautiful:

It is visible
It is clickable
It's just fucking beautiful

Seriously, what else do you fucking need, you entitled prick? A goddamn participation trophy for using a framework to do what HTML does out of the box? Maybe a gold star for managing to overcomplicate something that's been solved for decades? Get over yourself, asshole. HTML works, and it doesn't need your bullshit to prove it.

Now that we have AI, you still use JS frameworks? Are you fucking serious?

AI's out here, a gift from the heavens (or at least from Sam Altman's nerd fortress) ready to write your shitty little to-do app in five seconds flat. It can churn out pixel-perfect HTML, debug your fuck-ups, and probably even wipe your ass if you ask nicely. But no, you're still humping your frameworks like they're the last lifeboat on the Titanic. What the hell is wrong with you? Are you that addicted to 10,000 dependencies and a build process that takes longer than your last failed relationship?

Sam Altman's AI army is laughing its silicon balls off while you're knee-deep in React's virtual DOMshit, praying your app doesn't choke on its own bloated corpse. This isn't progress. It's a fucking tragedy. You've got a shiny new Ferrari in your garage, and you're still riding a rusty tricycle with a flat tire. Grow the fuck up.

Why HTML rocks

Everybody knows HTML

Listen up, dipshit. Every-fucking-body knows HTML. Your dearly great grandma? She was out there in the goddamn trenches of World War 2, dodging Nazi bullets while hand-coding <table> layouts to send encrypted messages to the Allies. Your grandad? He's got a motherfucking PhD in HTML from the prestigious University of Who-Gives-a-Rat's-Ass, probably hanging right next to his "I Survived Dial-Up" trophy. Your dad? That bastard was mumbling <div> and <span> before he could even choke out "mama". Shit, even your drooling mutt probably has a side gig churning out HTML sites on Fiverr. So why the fuck are we still stuck answering your brain-dead questions? Jesus Christ, get with the program.

No fucking hydration errors. Drink some water, asshole

What in the ever-loving fuck is a hydration error? Sounds like some hipster bullshit a barista would spew when your overpriced oat milk latte isn't wet enough. "Oh, my bad, bro, your coffee's got a hydration error". Get the fuck outta here. And "tree shaking"? Are you kidding me? What is this, a coding bootcamp or a lumberjack convention? "Yeah, boss, I spent all day shaking trees to trim my JavaScript bundle. Where's my flannel shirt?". Who the hell invents this pretentious crap? I don't have time to decode your buzzword salad, you self-important jackass. HTML doesn't pull this nonsense. It just fucking works.

You don't need to "support" HTML

Ever seen some motherfucker hire a whole team just to babysit HTML? That's fucking right. Nobody does that bullshit. HTML is so damn reliable it doesn't need a 24/7 support hotline like some needy-ass framework. While your bloated, over-engineered frameworks are out there throwing tantrums every time a browser updates or crying for patches every five minutes, HTML just sits back, cracks a beer, and does its goddamn job. So next time some slick salesman tries to shove "premium HTML support" down your throat, tell them to fuck off.

You don't need to "deploy" HTML

Deploying HTML? That's easier than deleting your browser history after a porn binge. Just throw your files into a web server directory, and boom. The whole fucking internet can see your crappy page. No 12-step deployment process, no DevOps wizards casting spells, no fucking Docker containers or CI/CD pipelines. Just drag, drop, and you're done. Meanwhile, your fancy frameworks need a goddamn NASA launch sequence just to push a button that says "Hello, World". HTML doesn't give a shit about your trendy deployment tools. It"s the dive bar of the web: always open, no frills, just works. Your framework? The hipster café that"s "temporarily closed" every time you need it.

You don't need Sparkling Ass UI to make shit look good, dumbass

All you need is fucking brains. Every year, yet another steaming pile of shit gets released: blazingly fast frameworks that are two farts ahead of the previous "groundbreaking" crap. Some call it progress. More rounded corners, more colorful colors, and one more thing to learn.

*^Fu^c_k t_h^a_t*

Just fucking use HTML. I shit you not, it actually looks good:

Bold text? Check.
Underlined text. Got it.
~~Strike fucking through~~? Highlighted text? Emphasized text?
Check &check;, check &check;, and ~holy shit~ check again. HTML's been doing this while you were still drooling over React.

Oh, and abbreviations? HTML. Go ahead, find your dirty trackpad behind the slice of pizza and hover over this motherfucker.

h2: Big motherfucker

Perfect for screaming your main points at the top of your lungs, like "FUCK FRAMEWORKS!"

h3: Slightly smaller motherfucker

Still loud enough to tell your subpoints to sit down and shut up.

h4: Even smaller

For when you need to whisper some passive-aggressive bullshit.

h5: You can still see me

Small, but not small enough to ignore, like that fucking bug in your framework that haunts your every commit.

h6: Nobody even uses these

Unless you're writing the fine print for your soul-selling terms of service.

See? HTML's got hierarchy, style, and your framework's out here trying to reinvent the wheel, but HTML already built the goddamn car, you overcomplicating prick.

Interactive shit? HTML's got it, no JS needed

Think you need your precious JavaScript for interactivity? Wrong, you clueless fuck. HTML's got expandable sections baked in:

Expandable motherfucker

Fucking boo, motherfucker 👻

And popovers? Yeah, native, no framework bloat. Eat this:

Didn't even know HTML could do this, huh? Suck it.

Dialogs that'll make you cry for mommy

Still not impressed? Fine, fine. Toss in a pinch of inline JS (right in the HTML, you purist twat) and you've got native dialogs. Pay close attention: no build steps, no frameworks, just raw power.

Forms that work on every Casio calculator

Prepare to be underwhelmed, asshole Fucking text input:
Email input for spam:
Password you'll forget in 5 minutes (8-20 characters, because fuck you):
Pick a number between 0 and 100, like it fucking matters:
Slide this to show how much you love HTML (0 to 100%):
Choose a date for your inevitable meltdown:
Set a time for your daily existential crisis:
Pick a date and time for your next panic error:
Select a month for your quarterly breakdown:
Choose a week to question all your life choices:
Pick a color that matches your soul (hint: it's probably gray):
Upload a file you'll never find again (PDF only, because we're assholes):
Check this if you're a robot (we won't tell, you soulless fuck)
Pick your poison: Option 1
Pick your poison: Option 2
Choose your favorite way to waste time, you lazy prick:
Pour your heart out here, or just bitch about frameworks:

<br/><label for="browser-input">Admit which browser you use (we already know it's trash):</label>
      <input type="text" id="browser-input" list="browsers"/>
      <datalist id="browsers">
        <option value="Chrome">
        </option><option value="Firefox">
        </option><option value="Safari">
        </option><option value="Internet Explorer (seriously, wtf?)">
      </option></datalist>
      <br/><label for="meter">Your current level of giving a fuck:</label>
      <meter id="meter" value="0.6">60% (barely)</meter>
      <br/><label for="progress">How close you are to rage-quitting this form:</label>
      <progress id="progress" value="70" max="100">70% (almost there)</progress>
      <br/></fieldset>

<button type="submit">Submit (to your fate, you pain junkie)</button>
    <button type="reset">Reset (your expectations, not that they were high)</button>
  </form>

<p>
    <small>
      *This form is powered real, raw HTML. No frameworks were harmed, because
      they're useless anyway.*
    </small>
  </p>

<p>
    So, what's your excuse now, huh? Still clinging to your trendy frameworks
    like a scared little bitch? HTML's like that crusty old barstool that's seen
    every fight and still holds your drunk ass up, no questions asked.
    Frameworks? They're the flimsy plastic chairs that snap the second you lean
    back too hard: overengineered bullshit that collapses under its own weight.
    HTML doesn't need your pity or your goddamn fanfare. It's too busy being the
    spine of every site you've ever clicked on, you ungrateful prick. So keep
    jerking off to your latest tech fad—HTML's over here, sipping whiskey, ready
    to outlast your entire career.
  </p>
</section>

<hr/>

<section readability="16">
  <h2>"Why not write Assembly then?"</h2>

<p>
    Oh, here comes the genius motherfucker with the big-brain counterargument:
    "Well, if HTML's so great, why not just write everything in Assembly, huh?".
    Wow, look at you, you clever little prick. Did you come up with that all by
    yourself? Writing web pages in Assembly is like using a fucking chainsaw to
    slice your overcooked steak: sure, it'll get the job done, but you're gonna
    look like a complete asshole while you're at it. HTML just works, you
    absolute tool. It's been the backbone of the web since Al Gore flipped the
    switch, and it'll still be here long after your trendy framework is rotting
    in a GitHub graveyard. So take your smartass logic and shove it. HTML's
    king, and you're just a peasant with a keyboard.
  </p>
</section>

<section readability="32">
  <h2>HTML lends crotches to your fucking JS</h2>
  <span hidden="" id="i_am_doofus">
    Yes you are, motherfucker
  </span>

<p>
    Did you know that when you slap an id on your HTML element, HTML doesn't
    just sit there like a lazy fuck. It actually creates a fucking variable in
    JavaScript for you? Yeah, you heard me, you clueless bastard. You don't even
    have to lift a finger. HTML's out here doing the heavy lifting while your JS
    is still trying to figure out how to tie its shoes.
  </p>

<p>
    Now go try it, open the console and type "i_am_doofus". Boom! There it is, you
    ungrateful shit. HTML just handed you a variable on a silver platter, and
    you didn't even have to beg for it. This is basic shit, and if you didn't
    know this, congrats. You're officially dumber than a bag of rocks.
  </p>

<p>
    This is HTML flexing its muscles, showing you it's not just some static
    bitch. It's dynamic, it's powerful, and it's been carrying your sorry ass
    since day one. Meanwhile, your JS is out here acting like it's the star of
    the show, when really, it's just riding HTML's coattails like a cheap date.
  </p>

<p>
    So next time you're jerking off to your fancy JS frameworks, remember: HTML's
    the one doing the real work, and it's laughing at your overcomplicated
    bullshit.
  </p>
</section>

<section readability="4.5">
  <h2>Words of wisdom</h2>

<blockquote cite="https://justfuckinghtml.com" readability="8">
    <p>
      It's the kind of page that makes you want to weep tears of joy and throw
      your overpriced JavaScript framework out the window. It's the kind of page
      that makes you want to quit your job and become a full-time HTML
      evangelist. It's the kind of page that makes you want to start a cult
      dedicated to the worship of HTML. It's the kind of page that makes you
      want to write a love letter to HTML and send it to the HTML gods. It's the
      kind of page that makes you want to build a shrine to HTML in your living
      room and invite all your friends over for a candlelit HTML worship
      session. It's the kind of page that makes you want to start a YouTube
      channel dedicated to HTML tutorials and rants. It's the kind of page that
      makes you want to write a book about HTML and self-publish it on Amazon.
      It's the kind of page that makes you want to start a TikTok account
      dedicated to HTML and post daily HTML dance videos. It's the kind of page
      that makes you want to start a LinkedIn account dedicated to HTML and
      connect with other HTML professionals.
    </p>
  </blockquote>
  <p>— <cite>Just Fucking Use HTML</cite></p>
</section>

<footer readability="13.555555555556">
  <small>
    </small><p>© Just Fucking Use HTML. All rights reserved, you framework-loving losers.</p>
    <p>
      If you're <em>still</em> using frameworks, at least have the decency to
      slap <a href="https://telebugs.com">Telebugs</a> on that mess early. Your
      app's gonna crash and burn anyway, even if it's raw HTML, but might as
      well watch it as it unfolds.
    </p>
    <p>Inspired by → <a href="https://motherfuckingwebsite.com/" rel="nofollow noreferrer noopener">this</a> motherfucker, who probably knows more about web development than you ever will.</p>
  
</footer>

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直接用HTML。 Just Fucking Use HTML